Usually, when people talk about achievements in life, they list things like academic success, status, financial success, etc.

There is a famous study called “The Harvard Study of Adult Development”, which is a long-term research project based at Harvard University that has tracked multiple generations of participants to understand human flourishing. It started in 1938!
It is one of the longest-running studies of adult life, focusing on happiness, health, and psychosocial well-being across the lifespan.

In this study, they found that good relationships were the strongest indicator of happiness, health, and life satisfaction over decades.

That means according to this study, good relationships were a stronger factor in long-term happiness and health than achievement, wealth, or status.

The Parsha this week says something quite similar, only written more than 3000 years prior. The Parsha goes through all the blessings that we would receive from Hashem as a result of following his commandments. One of the last and final ones is the blessing of peace. Rashi makes a comment and says that it is this blessing that really matters, for if one had all the wealth and popularity and success in the world, but without peace, they would really have nothing. In Rashi’s words, “If there is no peace, there is nothing!” and “that peace is equivalent to all blessings.”

This is why the Prophets say  ויספו ענוים בהוי’ שמחה “The humble shall increase their joy in Hashem”.

Why will the humble one have more joy?
While we may think that humility and restraint will reduce our achievements and success, and that we must be aggressive, outspoken, and arrogant to get our way. In truth, it is the quality of humility that leads to what matters most, peace.

This is why Kaddish ends with “Oseh Shalom,” why Bentching/Birkat Hamazon ends with the word, “Shalom,” and why the conclusion of the Amidah is also with “Shalom.”

This teaches us that whatever road we take in life to survive and succeed, it must be a road of peace and that leads to peace.

Shabbat Shalom

Rabbi Zalman & Esty